So hot. So Not!

This is just a chuckle piece.

The infamous Hollywood gossip-monger, Perez Hilton is now the subject of some interesting blogonews himself. Apparently he has been IMing with Jonathon Jaxson [sic] and there's sex tapes involved.

Yuksville, chucksville, but don't look away, car crash ahead! Jaxon seems obsessed with outing gay celebrities - what's that about in 2008. It's so yesterday.

I have no comment, check it out yourself:

Perez Hilton

Sex Scandal

Celebrity Buzz The blogger's in hot water for allegedly soliciting dirty videos from a naughty young man. You can breathe easy people: The sex tape in this scandal does not feature Mario "Perez Hilton" Lavandeira, he of the freakish hair. Instead, Lavandeira reportedly solicited sex tapes from another blogger in exchange for "help."

Does this stand as a case study in the differences between "real" and "accidental" journalists - the existence of a code of ethics and the fact that most journalists would take it seriously?

Hilton and his ilk are amusing (sometimes) and gross (most of the time), but they exist in our world now.

What I take some simple pleasure in is the way that other equally dubious blogspots have responded with clear contempt. The fruit does not fall far from the tree.

If this is the future of "journalism", I will drink myself to death!

Britney Spears - queen of the blogosphere

There's little doubt that the story of Britney Spears' disappearance with paparazzo Adnan Ghalib is garnering a lot of attention for the fruitcake singer and her sleazy boytoy (look at me sounding like those celeb-chasing tabloid types already).

The stuff is clogging up the blogosphere and taking up precious minutes in TV news bulletins.

someone is looking to milk this shit for all it's worth. It might even be Ghalib's photo agency, Finalpixx.
The finalpixx site has "exclusive" pictures of the couple and apparently the site didn't exist a few days ago; it's been recently launched to capitalise on the notoriety of Ghalib's "fling" with Spears.

That's it, I can't write any more, but I had to do something.

Is the world barking mad for celebrity trash

FOXNews.com - Paris Hilton's Dog Food Can Sells for $305 on eBay; Toothbrush Goes for $305 - Celebrity Gossip | Entertainment News | Arts And Entertainment

What is it with people? Soft-core celebrity Paris Hilton's trash is worth money.
Hey, if you want to buy some relics from my three cats, you're welcome. Tilly, Josie and Lexie consume hundreds of cans of Purr, Dine and Mother's Choice a month. You can have them all for $5.00 plus postage and handling.

Celebrity picture wars - worth a mint

OK! wins Zeta Jones picture battle
A British magazine has won a House of Lords appeal against a rival publication that published photos as a way of 'spoiling' its exclusive deal with Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones to print images from their wedding.
The judges' ruling is interesting. They decided that OK! magazine had paid for the right to impose a confidentiality agreement on wedding guests, one of whom is presumed to have taken the secret photos and sold them to rival Hello magazine.
So let's put this in perspective:
Two rich bums decide they want to make money by selling pictures of their celebrity-splashed wedding to a magazine. They sign an exclusive and then impose a confidentiality agreement on their guests (are you following this Aunty Beryl?). A court agrees that because money has changed hands, the guests are bound by this dubious contract.
It seems to me that the rights of the wedding guests to attend said celebration, get pissed and behave like idiots have been infringed here.
A word of warning. If you're planning a wedding, make sure you sign a confidentiality agreement with the photographer and ban your guests from taking happy snaps. Your exclusive with the Woman's Weekly could be at risk.
If the worst happens, you could always take the guest's cameras and feed them to that big sloppy dog on television who seems to like chowing down on the odd Canon sure-shot.

A poor excuse for drinking - better than none!

Campbell: 'I'm allergic to alcohol' - Digital Spy:

This must be a day for dumbduck celebrities to make amends - not quite apologies mind. Alan Jones claim to be 'sincere' [see below] and now a supermodel who's renowned for her tantrums when imbibing too much of the happy juice (in liquid and powder form) says it's her 'allergies'.
Take a bow, Naomi Campbell.

"According to BreakingNews.ie, Campbell has decided to give up drinking. She explained: 'I choose not to drink today in my life because I find that I'm allergic to alcohol. I'm not someone that's in denial of my problems and I'm not going to lie about my problems and I'm not hiding my problems."

Denial? Naomi, you're positively gushing! She hasn't been in the news much since she finished her uber-fashionable gig as a cleaning lady - to atone for previous sins.

This is a blog about journalism and alcohol, but I've never stooped so low as to blame my love of martinis on a medical condition. Though I have been known to have one or two for purely 'medicinal' purposes.
In fact, I'm going to buy a bottle of reasonable gin and some olives on the way home. I've had a tough week here in the blogosphere, spent most of it at home in mi sick bed.
Now's the time to live a little, before the allergies kick in.

Celeblogging - so yesterday

"Celeblogging" - the tasteless art of tittle-tattle about two-bit half-wits that we're sick of hearing about.

Does Australia, or the world for that matter, really need or deserve another senseless and humourless website devoted to blogging about celebrities? Well, apparently one company thinks there's money to be made by mining this weak vein once again. Here's a story from Friday's edition of crikey, which outlines the deal.

Crikey 27 April 2007

Look out, wonkettes: Defamer hits Oz

By Jane Nethercote

Defamer now has an Australian lovechild.

Based in LA, the original Defamer blog -- part of the Gawker Media stable along with Gawker , Wonkette and Valleywag -- takes Hollywood gossip for a smart and riotous spin.

Australia is getting some of the action. Not that there's been much fanfare -- Crikey only discovered the active site yesterday thanks to a bit of procrastinatory internet gambolling. Gawker Media's gadget blog Gizmodo also has an Australian spin-off .

The two titles are published in Australia by Allure Media -- an outfit that was established by Netus, an investment company which sets up proven tech-based business models in the Australian market. Netus, which is financially backed by News Limited, is run by folk like eCorp alumni Daniel Petre and Alison Deans who helped bring eBay to Australia (as MediaConnect/ITJourno (via Squash) has noted).

Crikey understands that Netus initiated the arrangement, approaching Gawker Media to do a licensing deal. And although it's stopping at two blogs at this stage, Allure Media in fact has "rights to all the Gawker titles", managing director of Allure Media Chris Janz tells Crikey.

But we shouldn't expect an Australian Wonkette any time soon. They're stopping at one gossip publication for now.

Defamer was chosen for Australia, rather than its more famous sister blog Manhattan-based Gawker, because the Hollywood focus translates more easily for an Australian audience. And Defamer Oz will be sharing copy with the US version.

As for the Australian content, it's in good hands. At the helm is Jess McGuire who established herself as an Australian blogosfigure at pop culture mecca Ausculture which brought us all-important live blogging of Australian Idol and Big Brother, Neighbours wraps, Dolly Parton Appreciation Week and turkeyslapgate.

So will the bitchy and witty Ausculture vibe penetrate Defamer Oz? "I would hope so", McGuire tells Crikey. There are "no plans of impersonating Mark [Lisanti], editor of Defamer. The good folks that are getting me to do it, knew what they were getting into. I won't change my writing style too much ... Though perhaps I "won't be as rudely angry about political issues".

The Defamer approach is to "not ever really be cruel" and "that's my philosophy" for the Australian edition, she says. The aim is to produce something that's shamelessly pop culture-based but more clever than one-trick ponies like puerile gossip blog Perez Hilton. "I can't fathom why the Australian media is bending over backwards for Perez Hilton", says McGuire. "He's not a good writer ... I have a problem with the media fel-ating him". There are "far better bloggers in the States writing about pop culture".

Still, she concedes, "there's a market for everything".

Yep, including a "bitch slap" festival between the Defamer crew and a two-bit, "blogger to the stars", Perez Hilton.

The sooner we get over our obsession with celebrity, the better. This stuff is so purile it makes reality television look positively Shakespearean, not!

Just a thought: Isn't Perez Hilton that little dog that Paris carries in her Gucci tote along with the cocaine, marijuana, s*x toys and video-camera?